Vancouver Offers Winter Olympics To Washington, DC

(FiniteTimes.com) – In a stunning move, sources are telling The Finite Times that the city of Vancouver has approached Washington, DC about possibly hosting the 2010 Winter Olympic Games that are slated to open this Friday.

“It’s a daunting challenge in the best of economic times to make enough snow to satisfy both the athletes and the NBC executives who are looking for a lot of snowy backdrops to film their human interest stories against,” said a source close to the International Olympic Committee, the Olympic organization that would have to approve any such move. “I think city officials in Vancouver were just watching Washington get dumped on over the past week and were thinking ‘Fuuuuuudge, do us a biggie, eh?’”

While the Olympic torch has been run in circles in Richmond, BC all day while Olympic organizers wait for the two cities to sort the matter out, many Washington insiders feel a games switch to their turf is unlikely.

“It would take an act of Congress to get the opening ceremonies here on Friday,” said one White House staffer, speaking off the record. “I don’t think Congress could get together to order a frigging pizza in that time frame, much less allocate funds for an Olympic games.”

Still, supporters of a DC games have been out in force since the rumor first broke this morning, painting speed-skating lines on the frozen Reflecting Pond and starting to erect a ski jump scaffolding along the face of the Washington Monument.

“We’ve had the past couple of days off because of the snow anyways, so we figured why not?” said a US Government Printing Office employee named Bob. Bob and a co-worker had been working throughout the morning at carving a luge run out of a mountain of plowed snow. “It’s just so refreshing to spend the day doing something substantive, you know?”

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