World admin on 06 Jul 2006 12:53 pm
North Korea: “Happy Birthday, Uncle Sam!”
(FiniteTimes.com) – North Korea is expressing shock that its lavish celebration honoring American independence is being misinterpreted.
“We shoot up missiles, say ‘Happy Birthday, Uncle Sam!’” an announcer said on Pyongyang’s Korean Central Broadcast Station. “What we get for our troubles? Condi Rice threaten to hump us. No thank you sister!”
Asian History Professor Wu Butler, Columbia University, said that North Korea’s intentions may well have been misconstrued.
“While most countries in the world favor fireworks that offer fun colors, physical displays and sounds, the North Koreans celebrate by raising villages with missiles loaded with more lethal ordinance,” Butler said. “You hear a bunch of North Koreans going “ooh” and “aah”, you know a herd of goats just got the shit blown out of it.”
North Korea’s next celebratory launchings will occur on July 7 to commemorate the creation of the Vatican City State in 1929. North Korean officials are begging the international community not to “freak the fuck out, ok?”
Vatican officials did not return calls requesting comments for this article.
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