The Finite Times

(FiniteTimes.com) – As she struggles to address inconsistencies in her recent accounts on Bosnia, Northern Ireland and NAFTA, Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton is now facing a new assault on her veracity. The Finite Times has uncovered proof that her latest recollections dealing with her efforts to reform health care in 1992 might not be completely accurate.

“It was a war, it really was. We even had to set up a War Room in June of ’93 to handle it,” Hillary Clinton told a gathering of the Indiana Young Republicans this week. “I remember going up to Capitol Hill to testify, and we circled the building a few times because they said roving bands of Congressmen had been known to frequent the area. We had to duck and make a mad dash for the main entrance, all while rotten vegetables rained down around us. Continue Reading »

(FiniteTimes.com) – Scorched over the past few days by allegations that she embellished a 1996 visit to Bosnia, Hillary Clinton received at least a partial vindication today when it was revealed that Sniper Fire was indeed present at the Bosnia airport when she and her entourage touched down.

The neo-polka sextet Sniper Fire, that is. Continue Reading »

(FiniteTimes.com) – The first one appeared by chance.

“I was cleaning up one of the rooms that her staff had occupied – they had the whole gosh darned wing – and it was there under the bed near an empty doughnut box,” recalls Vera Johnson, a chambermaid at the Cincinnati Embassy Suites Hotel. “I seen them movies, and it as likes to scare the bejesus out of me.” Continue Reading »